Giving up on giving up.

To letting go. 

Here's a toast.

To not letting the demons win.

The sips are so disparate. 

Life has been so patient with me.

I need to be patient with it. 

To making appointments.

Coming early.

To showing yourself. 

Your expectations are all that matter. 

Unsettled & Unwavered

Observing the way your eyes don't lock.

Catching the awkward desperation.

We all feel lonely sometimes.

There's a need;

Certain people never fill it.

Others find the answer in inconvenient places.

Hiding.

Out in the open.

Waiting to be found.

To be needed. 

Everyone is dripping sweat,

Dissatisfaction.

I don't want this;

I don't need this.

Craving real interaction.

The desire for you to be uncomfortable.

The need for you to open up. 

A real connection.

We are everything we love and hate within ourselves.

Yet, this is the only constant. 

Would You Like Another?

The fading of lights.

The light chatter of loved ones.

The love for a drink.

Desire intertwines us.

Defining vocabulary

Defines circumstances.

Eliminates naivety.

You can't define everything.

The lines throughout your face

Facing the one you know you love.

Not knowing reciprocation.

Vulnerability reflects strength.

The ways in which we writhe

Away from the demons in our sleep

The demons drive our days

And draft our desires.

Not Patient Enough for an Edit.

A crimson wave crashes over me.

Numbness ensues.

Clarity reaches the surface.

A fist full of faith.

Clutching at the leaves and scattered gravel. 

The smoke slithering through the fingers.

It's so hard to grasp the air.

I can hardly catch my breath. 

The warm feeling of sand beneath your feet,

Curling between your toes,

Can be taken away in a single blink.

That lonesome sneaker wave,

Pulling everything under that's within reach.

Close my eyes.

The sea has to spit you out eventually.

It's buried treasures are much more valuable.

How dare you think you're worth the ocean floor?

To Be Aware.

Of taste. Texture. Sounds. Colors.

Movements. Motivations.

The why. The how.

To not disregard a single detail.

Of any single moment.

The bad and the good.

The ugly and the beautiful.

The temperature. The humidity.

Every breath.

The air flowing through your body.

The oxygen shooting through your veins.

To slow down.

To stop.

To live.

To understand what makes people tick,

Is the ultimate wisdom.

Convoluted At Best.

Stop. Listen. Respond.

Wrong.

Keep your eyes and ears focused on the same page.

Gentle words freely flow,

Striking skin like thorns,

Tearing at the the stitches.

The pain sparks the screams.

Pause. Rewind. Patience.

Keep your eyes focused on the same page.

Fear, hurt, love, all drip from the same ink.

A collision of correspondence. 

Saying everything and nothing.

Nauseating. 

My Safe Place

As the wind lifts the leaves,
The rain pulls them back to the cold, wet ground.
I find my center in the warmth
That these tan and white swirls provide.
Through pure and ceramic saucers
Atop copper countertops,
The calming energy that fills the room.
Sincere smiles upon familiar faces.
Tender hearted touches.
We all feel the same inside.

Alvaretta.

I just wish the world would stop.
So we could sit together
In the stillness, the quiet
And breathe in your beauty.
Cry out our apologies.
Rest in our longings
To see your face one last time.
Smiling, glowing, like it always was.
To embrace you and gently tell you
Just how much we love you.

Words Can't Describe

In a world full of suffering,

Your eyes manage to disclose love,

But your voice echoes apprehension,

As the lies come trickling out.

Those fingers that fondle mine,

Are the same ones that sever this tie.

Longing to gaze past the lies

Into that heart you’re struggling to hide.

There’s a man inside that yearns to love,

Aspiring for something more

Peel back the mask, uncover the wound.

It can’t heal without air.

I’m here to hold your heart,

To keep it safe in my embrace.

If you’ll dare to let me in,

I’ll promise to always dwell there.

Love Is Not An Anchor

From across the room her heart is caught,

Tangled in that dark hair and dashing smile.

His eyes speak of innocence,

From his mouth flows comfort.

Oh how sweet young love is.

The days unfold with delightful dates,

Everyone enjoys his company.

Perfect moments come in waves,

But each debate dissolves in his kiss.

This surely must be true love.

Wrapped up in the comfort of being young,

Until her stomach turns without consent,

Thoughts of loneliness proven wrong.

The soon to be lucky mother and wife.

Who would ever want anything else?

Disapproving looks come as greetings,

She’ll prove to them that she is strong.

Until the sting of his hand severs the tension,

The words from his tongue grasp her throat.

But still they profess his love.

The years unravel in a steady motion.

Three miracles later her smile has faded.

That gleam of love now glossed over.

Weakness painted across a guilt-stricken face.

What is love anyways…

Until the day his hands cross the tracks,

To territory she’d never known.

Her hidden strength sparked like a match.

This capsized ship shall sail again,

But love calls for a different captain.

Time for transformation in a foreign land.

Scared and meek, but determination shall prevail.

Close those eyes and open them,

Three strong girls holding hands.

The nightmare’s over and love’s dream has began.

A Mother’s Love Never Ends

All this time I watch my children grow,

Teaching and guiding with all I have,

Hoping I’ve done them well.

Through the bumps and bruises,

Pain caused and tears shed,

I’ve wished to wipe them all away.

But every time that smile shines,

A man, young or old, standing tall,

My face lights up with joy.

They have so much more to do,

Learning things I couldn’t teach,

Loving others with all they have.

So, my Sons,

Promise to keep your heads high,

Cause even when I’m gone,

I’ll always be so proud.

Childhood Memories

I dream of being little again.

Chests of princess dresses,

Oh, what it was like back then…

We had the whole world to gain,

All of those lifelong lessons.

I dream of being little again.

Every evil villain was slain,

Protecting castles at recess.

Oh, what it was like back then…

Don’t you remember when,

You only had one address?

I dream of being little again.

Every game or goal we’d always win.

We were naïve in worldly stresses

Oh, what it was like back then…

Making the same mistakes time and again,

It was okay to be the damsel in distress.

I dream of being little again.

Oh, what it was like back then…

Life's Storms

A tree fort collapsed,

An obstacle in the path,

Momentarily.

A Smile

People scurry streets

Without ever noticing

Genuine moments.

Contentment

As we sit above the city

We watch the cars whirring by,

Wrapped up in our cozy covers and sheets,

Enveloped in each other’s embrace.

As the rest of this town is out,

We hear shrieks among the streets.

Wrapped up in parties and performances,

Enveloped in impulsive pleasures.

As we huddle within our home,

We catch scenes across the screen,

Wrapped up in these stories portrayed in film,

Enveloped in enjoying ourselves.

Making Music

Vibrations whirl among the zephyr

As his fingers symphonize the steel strings.

He holds his hollow blue box,

Chords cause the crowd to kick up their feet.

A strap strung across his neck.

A smile composed upon his face.

Those fingers glide so gracefully,

As spectators sway in harmony.

The Masquerade

Feathers and glitter reflect in my eyes.

Secrets and faults shine through yours.

Everyone’s bedazzled from head to toe.

Hands connect and lead our feet.

Trusting a stranger to direct our path,

As dresses flow with each new step.

Glamour and glitz complete the mood.

Drinks and laughter fill the room.

Facades collide while masks hide lies.

While We Wait

There’s a layer of haze over the glass

Making it strenuous to see through this window,

But the radiant sun perseveres.

The chill in the air stings upon our skin;

Cars and people scurrying by,

The world accelerates in speed,

As we reluctantly remain in place.

Waiting for an undefined transition,

Any movement or advancement.

Patient until our lives can thrive,

And we can clearly see past this dusty room

Into a new chapter of our lives.

Living Paycheck to No Paycheck

Always a step away from falling

Doubt and shame keep a’ calling.

This cold world shakes his security

With no appreciation for love and purity.

The wealthy man’s mouth overflows with lies,

While the honest man’s nights are filled with cries,

Of a beater car, piled up bills, and a rundown house

Unable to buy his wife nice jewelry or a new blouse.

“Spare some change?” he timidly says.

No one even looks his way.

They go on to their warm homes and cars

Continue to the restaurants and bars.

Food and shelter are not considered vital,

When you are seen as no longer entitled.

A scoff, a glare is what’s reserved

For those who got what they deserved.

But one day a sincere smile catches his eye

As a beautiful woman walks by.

She stops and puts some cash in his can

And kindly holds both of his hands.

He tells her his story as they exchange names.

“You’re so cold out here!” she exclaims.

Then she finds him a warm room nearby

So, for a night, comfortable he shall lie.

In a nice bed with pillows and soft sheets,

This hotel room makes a man feel complete.

Even if only short lived,

It is an immaculate gift.

The clean, warm water engulfs his skin,

Suds remove this world’s filth and sin.

Sun rays break through the curtains

As this man’s plans are uncertain.

He dresses and glances in the mirror,

Rest and cleanness wipes away his fear.

He steps out the door into a new today,

Heads to the library and builds a resume.

A purpose is what he’s searching for,

And a home behind a comforting door.

Your Loving Daughter

Your presence lingers about our home

As I yearn to grasp beyond the unknown.

Why would God take someone so noble

From this world that is all too immobile?

My father, my friend, my everything;

Without you I’m walking into the unseen.

The thumps and pounds as you built with ambition,

Creating wonderful things was your inspiring mission.

I need your words and guidance

So I know I won’t face subsidence.

Even now I hear your footsteps in the halls

Your voice always whispers until sleep calls.

I know now you’re in a splendid place

Still I long for your warm embrace.

The wood burning in the winter time,

Your joyous laugh that was always mine.

Please keep close watch over me,

As I fulfill my lifelong journey.

Your grandchildren and cherished ones to come,

Will long for never knowing such a loving one.

But I promise to always live as praiseworthy as I can.

I am proud for every bit of you that I am.

My loving daddy you’ll forever be,

Please keep close watch over me.